
Photograph by lilivanili
Truthful.
Useful.
Timely.
According to my partner, after reading a book about Buddhism, these three concepts are all part of the Noble Eightfold Path’s Right Speech. If you are familiar with these you may be scratching your head because truthful, useful, and timely are not specifically mentioned, you are probably correct. These are the three concepts my partner disseminated from the information in the book.
We spent an hour in a coffee shop yesterday discussing these because they keep ringing in my mind, chiming like Tibetan peace bells gone wild. In my non-enlightened way, my mind tries to find loopholes in the concept. If I can take them apart, I can understand them or so I think.
“Remember that really Rubenesque woman we saw at Halloween?” I ask my partner, sipping my coffee and really debate about putting cream in it. Maybe skim milk would be better.
“You mean the 200 pound ballerina in the white leotard. The one who forgot her bra and thought wearing a thong was a good thing?” my partner responds, savoring the steamed milk in his latte.
Funny how he knows where I am going with this, “Yes, that is the one. I did not say anything at the time other than I thought she was brave and must have good self-esteem, but it really was not something I wanted to see. With this Right Speech stuff, would it not have behooved the situation then for me to say, ‘Please put your coat back on. I really do not want to look at you wearing that costume.’ That would qualify, don’t you think? It was truthful, timely, and useful - useful to her because it let her know that she was aesthetically offending me and that it was 30 degrees that night. She could have caught cold.”
I really would never say such a thing to another person (unless there was some sort of situation that truly demanded it and I cannot think what that would be). It is her business how she dresses and I have the option of looking elsewhere. But in thinking about Right Speech, I know that the truth has to be universal, not just personal - so my truth of aesthetic issues is only mine. I guess that would void the whole put-your-coat-on sentiment. Useful? It would have been useful for me and to possibly help her not too catch cold. Yet, it could have been damaging to her. If she cared at all about what other’s think, it could have hurt her.
So maybe Right Speech is more than those words: truthful, useful, and timely. Maybe there should be codicils to it like being kind and non-damaging. Maybe this is what I was really trying to say a few weeks ago when I questioned the need to report on news that can be damaging to a person who has not yet been proven guilty.
Here is one of my attempts today to Right Speech. It is a show of gratitude. Though I am not specifically joining the entrecard crowd in celebrating a new monthly “top dropper day” (which was yesterday), I do have my own form of thanks.

First, thanks to Lofty Matters (she received the Butterfly Award from me last month) - it is a most interesting and positive read. I think she has the whole Right Speech thing down pretty well. Also, she has visited here everyday for the past three months.
There are two other blog that need some kudos, too, since they have dropped their entrecard on me everyday for two months. They are:
And of course, thank you to everyone else who has visited, dropped ECs, or commented here. It is nice to know I am not alone in the universe.
Now for the Sunday Question - if you were to describe the idea of “Right Speech,” what would your criteria include?